Monday, June 8, 2020

Plague Journal, Day 87: The Kid Muses On School Year's End, Color Rankings

“Dad.”
“Yes?” I’m tucking The Kid into bed. 

“Normally this would be such a great time of the year. Seventh grade would basically be over.” 

“You still have three weeks left.” 

“But grades are due at the end of this week. The last two weeks, we usually just sit around and do fun stuff. Watch movies.” 

“Sort of like what you do every day in CoronaWorld?” 

“That’s what I mean! Normally we’d be saying goodbye, looking forward to time off, getting away from school, doing all the summer fun stuff. Now it’s like: School will be over, and how will we even be able to tell?” 

“We could do summer projects. I mean besides figuring out which high schools you want to apply to.” 

“Dad. Why do you always want to fill every spare minute with projects?” 

“Not every spare minute. But projects help keep you focused. Give you something to finish, something to look forward to. I’m talking about fun things, not weeding dandelions from the backyard. Maybe we could read ‘Romeo and Juliet,’ since you didn’t get to read it in your humanities class. I know that was disappointing.” 

“It wasn’t disappointing to not read it; it was disappointing not to be able to act out a scene with My Best Friend. She was going to wear a great dress for Juliet, and I was going to wear a suit for Romeo. The teacher's got a costume trunk filled with stuff."

“I see. Maybe we could act it out this summer. I read somewhere that’s a good thing to do on videoconference — play readings. Maybe your friends would be interested.” 

“Dad. No.” 

“Why not?” 

“Reasons.” 

“I take it that means you’re not going to tell me why it’s a bad idea? 

“Yes.” 

“Yes, you’re going to tell me?” 

“Yes, I’m not going to tell you.”

“All right. You know I find that annoying.” 

Earlier. The Kid and I talk about an acquaintance who is literal minded, at times to the point of obtuseness. I say his mind sometimes “entrenches,” keeps him from seeing a wider picture. 

“My brain definitely works that way,” she says. “I can rank all the colors of the rainbow, but I don’t share it with anyone because the real order they should be in is rainbow order.” 


“What do you mean?” 

“Well, my ranking is: blue, purple, green, yellow, red, orange. But if I saw it in that order, I’d probably murder someone.” 

“It’s a terrible acronym, for starters. Not that ROYGBIV is all that great.” 

“You're including ‘indigo’? Frick indigo.” 

“It makes the acronym work.” 

“Don’t get me wrong, I love indigo. I have respect for colors absent from the rainbow. But indigo’s the only tertiary color, and it throws off the pattern.” 

“Of the six on your list, I’d put yellow last.” 

“No! Why? Yellow is so happy. I love her. She’s amazing.” 

“Well, my preferences aren't strong. But, under duress: blue, purple, red, green, orange, yellow.” 

“Why are you snubbing yellow? She’s such a cupcake.” 

“Just personal preference, Rabbit. I can’t explain it. The only instability would be that red and green flip-flop for me. Tomorrow I might prefer green.” 

“Green is far better.” 

“Not 'far.'” 

“Honestly, he’s a bitch. But his color is — mwah!” She gives it a chef’s kiss. 

“Why assign genders?” 

“I’m not assigning them; they have them. I can’t explain it.” 

“Hmmmm.” 

“But it’s not gender roles, either. Like, purple’s a boy. Red’s a girl. Orange is non-binary. Yellow is a girl. Green is a boy. Blue is a girl. Purple is a boy.” 

“Is there some sort of general agreement about this, or is it particular to you?”

“As far as I know it’s just me. I could give you detailed rundowns of their personalities, if you want.” 

“Please. You should create a doc.” 

“I totally should.” 

She totally did, staying up late one night to finish. Like I said: It’s good to have a project. 

Red: She’s whip-smart and can come off too strong sometimes. If she were in school she’d dominate the classroom discussion, but she really doesn’t mean to. She gets super excited about the things she likes and it’s really sweet to watch, although if you don’t know her, she might seem mean. 
Orange: They’re hard to pin down for me. When I figured out that they were non-binary it was a huge breakthrough, because it was perfect. I think that’s why they’re last on my list. I really have to get to know them a bit better.
Yellow: She’s such a sweet little cinnamon roll of happiness. She just wants everyone to get along and be happy. She’s easy to like and likes almost everyone, but if she doesn’t like you she really doesn’t like you, especially if you cross her or her friends. Like a little sheepdog, she hates it when her friends fight. Everyone needs to be together.
Green: He’s snarky and sarcastic to everyone. He can be really funny, but if he’s having a bad day then he’s just mean. He’s also desperately in love with Yellow and it’s crazy obvious to everyone except her. If Yellow gets angry, she and Green will absolutely beat someone up together. And he really does care about people, he just doesn’t show it.
Blue: She’s stunning, like people-stare-when-she-walks-into-the-room stunning. But her head’s in the clouds. She’s dreamy and flighty, and constantly mumbles random things. Sometimes they’re philosophical musings, but mostly they’re just things like, “But if the hot dog… well, if that’s two kilometers…” She also memorizes random facts and collects pizza tables.
Purple: He’s content with drawing quietly in the corner, and looks up to talk only to say that the room is too cold, and could you please close that window, or things like that. He prioritizes comfort, does what he loves, and doesn’t care if he does something world-changing one day. If he did it would be by accident, although he’d be happy that he helped people.
 

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